GOAL!!!!!!!!!!!!

Isn't that what they say at soccer games?  Or is it score?  I don't know.  I'm not into sports.

This is a picture of my mom and I at a UH game last summer.  We only went because it was in the air conditioned Reliant Stadium.

Weeks ago I outlined a pretty extensive plan for my weight loss.  I included what I would eat and when I would incorporate certain foods back into my diet.  What you may have noticed missing is a goal weight from that plan.

So what is my goal?

Well I sort of don't have one.  At least not a set numerical goal.  There are a lot I could use.  The CDC says that I need to weigh less than 155 to be considered healthy.  On the day of my wedding I weighed around 150 and it was the thinnest I had ever been.  Maintaining that weight required exercising twice daily and feeling hungry all the time.  When I weighed 175 I thought I was obese and incredibly fat but looking back on it, I looked quite nice I think.  Sometimes I think that if I could just change that number on the scale from a two to a one, I would be set so maybe 199 is a good goal.

This was probably 150-ish, right before Dave and I got engaged.

Here I was probably 175 and I thought I was HUGE!

This weight was hovering right below 200 and I also thought I was HUGE.  It's all relative, I guess.

Here's my big problem with a weight loss goal.  At least for now, 150 seems like a pipe dream.  It's too far away and feels like an unachievable goal.  Thinking about it is overwhelming and makes me want to give up.  Setting a goal like 199 or 175 feels comfortable and good and like something I can do but once I reach that goal, why should I stop?

So this is my goal.  I just want to be healthy.  I want to retrain myself to eat normal amounts of healthy food and I will just let my weight settle there.  I don't want to be hungry all the time but I want to stop overeating.  I want to be active and exercise every day but I don't want to be fanatical about it.

This really isn't a diet I'm doing.  It's much more than that.  I'm making a lifestyle change that I'm hoping will stay with me forever.  Setting a goal implies that there will be an end to this journey when, in reality, this trail will never end.  My goal is to be as healthy as I can forever.  There just isn't a number in the world to encapsulate that theory.